Adultery is one of the most common reasons why marriages fail. Spouses who discover that their husband or wife has been engaged in sexual activity with others during the course of the marriage may find themselves unable to forgive them enough to want to continue as a couple. This is especially true if multiple occurrences of this type of behavior is found or when the straying spouse is also involved in other bad behavior, such as gambling or drug abuse. But even though the urge to immediately file for divorce is strong when a spouse's illicit actions come to light, it can be beneficial to slow down the process. If you are planning to divorce, start by taking these steps well before the date you plan to file.  

Document the activity

Keeping a simple journal or calendar with dates and times of adulterous activities is a good way to help build your case for divorce. When keeping this information, include the place where the activity took place, who it involved, and the time and date. If possible, also include copies of any text messages, emails, or other correspondence or documentation that help to prove the spouse's adulterous activity.

Gather financial records

Spouses who have already proven to engage in secretive behaviors, such as adultery, may also be inclined to attempt to hide assets or money when going through a divorce. This is why it is important for spouses who plan to file for divorce to carefully gather financial records that show all assets earned and debts assumed during the marriage. When gathering this type of information, plan to include: 

• real estate property deeds, deeds of trust, and mortgage information
• vehicle titles, along with any car loan information that applies
• lists of valuables, such as jewelry, furs, furnishings, etc. 
• copies of consumer debt information, such as credit card statements
• tax returns

While this information is typically gathered during the actual divorce process, taking the time to prepare a list before your spouse knows you are planning to divorce them can be a good way to keep them from attempting to hide any assets or property during the court proceedings. 

Consult with a professional

Taking the time to sit down with an attorney well before the filing is to occur is a good way to ensure that your interests are protected throughout the process. The attorney will be able to educate you on your state's actual divorce laws and help you see how they will affect the outcome. If children are involved in the process, hiring an attorney as soon as possible is the best way to ensure that any custody, visitation, and support agreements will be fair to all parties.

Contact a firm, like Hazlett & Pedemonte, for more help.